


energy altercations

by nebulousviolet



Category: H.I.V.E. Series - Mark Walden
Genre: Crack, Drabble, Gen, a healthy amount of ghost-adjacent discourse, also yes you have 2 be 16 to buy energy drinks in the uk, i will once again double down on otto being a caffeine addict, it is the bane of my baby-faced life, otto and raven: world's worst roommates!, set between aftershock and deadlock
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-10-10
Updated: 2020-10-10
Packaged: 2021-03-08 04:49:14
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 428
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26929927
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nebulousviolet/pseuds/nebulousviolet
Summary: Raven’s eye visibly twitched. “If I’ve learned anything, Malpense, it’s that I can always trust you to be contrary. I’m sure you’ll break the laws of the natural world somehow.”Otto was almost touched.(Otto's energy drink addiction is a subject of much disgust.)
Relationships: Otto Malpense & Natalya | Raven (H.I.V.E.)
Comments: 2
Kudos: 11





	energy altercations

**Author's Note:**

> got some VERY good news yesterday and instead of angst my brain was like: good vibes!! good vibes ONLY!!! so here we are. this is short and stupid much like me lmfao

“If that doesn’t kill you,” Raven said casually, as she eyed Otto and his third can of monster energy in as many hours, “then I promise I will. And I swear, if it  _ does  _ kill you, I’m going to do my damned best to murder your ghost, too.”   
  
Otto took a challenging sip. Somewhere inside his head, H.I.V.E.mind gave a feeble word of protest. (He’d given up on truly being able to talk Otto out of his caffeine addiction a long time ago, but Otto sensed that it was the principle of the thing.)

“I thought you didn’t believe in ghosts,” he pointed out, because he’d watched her get into an incredibly heated debate about it with  _ Shelby,  _ of all people, over what felt like a lifetime ago. (“Just admit that there’s a possibility,” Shelby had said, arms crossed over her chest in her usually smug, semi-insufferable manner. “A  _ slight  _ chance.” “I don’t have to admit anything,” Raven had said hotly, and Wing had looked as though he were about three seconds away from physically intervening.) There was nothing Otto enjoyed more than the chance to use someone’s own words against them, even if that someone was the world’s deadliest assassin who currently doubled as his roommate.

Raven’s eye visibly twitched. “If I’ve learned anything, Malpense, it’s that I can always trust you to be contrary. I’m sure you’ll break the laws of the natural world somehow.”   
  


Otto was almost touched.

  
“Well, you still can’t kill a ghost,” he declared. “That’s stupid. I’d be incorporeal, for one. You’d have to also be a ghost, and even then it wouldn’t be a sure thing.”   
“This conversation is stupid,” Raven grumbled, looking as though she wanted to throw something at him. It would hardly be the first time. “My point is that those things are going to lead you to an early grave.”   
She sounded eerily like Nero; it was honestly surprising that she didn’t sound  _ more  _ like him, generally speaking, and had instead retained her litany of Russian curse words and awfully-translated idioms. “I think I’ll take my chances,” Otto declared, taking another swig. “I don’t know what your moral objection is, anyway. I’m over sixteen; I’m allowed to buy them.”   
  
Raven stared at him. “Are you really resorting to the  _ law  _ to justify this?”   
“It’s not a law,” Otto said primly, “but yes.”   
Raven set her jaw. “Fine,” she said. “Fine. Next time we’re in a high-risk confrontation, I’m not speeding. Since you care so much about what the _law_ has to say.”   
“ _ Raven! _ ”


End file.
